Monday, February 16, 2015

Holiday Organization: Top 12 Oddest Movie Presidents

In honor of the oddly-conjoined Birthdays of our First (if you don't know History) and 16th Presidents, I bring you...some fake ones.  I'm weird that way.  In lieu of a Review, here's a Top 10 List.

Actually, you know what?  It's a Holiday, so let's make it 12!

The question is this: who is the oddest Movie/TV President around?  There are so many to choose from.  You have early Films with Presidents with odd credentials and even recent Films that touch upon the subject oddly.  This List will cover over fifty years worth of material that made my cut, so prepare for a Gumbo-style selection.  It is all here.

12. The Brady Bunch in the White House: In this 2002 TV Movie, the impossibly-polite head of the Brady Clan gets elected President.  Need I say more?

11. Independence Day: In this not-so-great, but-who-cares-it-made-tons-of-money Film, the current President leads the attack against the alien Invaders in a fighter jet.  I don't care if the U.S. President is Starscream- all glory to the Scream!-, he's not leading the attack.  Period.

10. Airline Disaster: Talk about getting your bets wrong!  In this Asylum Film, the President is played by a now-Birney-less Meredith Baxter.  They have her look and act like Hillary Clinton.  Meanwhile, the head of the FBI Team trying to rescue her brother's family is a dead ringer for Obama.  Intentional or accidental- you decide!

Oh and her Brother is a commercial Airline Pilot, since that would lead to no security issues.

9. Atlas Shrugged I-III: I'll be Political for a second, so bear with me.  In this hilariously-bad Trilogy of Films based on a hilariously-ridiculous Book, the 'Head of State' (never called President) is a middle-aged white guy who hates business and wants them to be part of the collective.  Soviet Russia would be proud...if they were still a thing...or freezing their balls off.

8. Superman IV: Bless for you trying...in such a goofy way.  Mind you, I'm definitely in the 'No Nukes' Camp- no question.  Even so, the idea that the President gave Superman, a space alien, the right to throw all of our nukes into the Sun is a little silly.  Superman is a nice guy and all, but I can't help but feel that an actual 5th Film in the Series would have involved him taking over and ruling us with an iron fist a la Zod (or him in a dozen comic Stories over the years).

7. Scary Movie 3/Hot Shots- Part Deux: I couldn't do both or separate these two.  In Scary Movie, Leslie Nielsen is our bizarre and inept President who needs Charlie Sheen- the Tiger Blood Guy?- to save us.  In Hot Shots, Lloyd Bridges is a President who ends up saving Charlie Sheen- the 'Winning' Guy?- by sword fighting Saddam Hussein.  Why not?

6. Lawnmower Man 2- Beyond Cyberspace: Not a major player here, but one worth mentioning.  Evil Jobe is behind a Computer Company's Internet-of-sorts launch.  On launch day, everyone logs into the Internet via...Virtual Reality Helmets.  Sure.  Our President even agrees to be a Day 1 Tester, which is a terrible idea.  You don't want to keep your Cerebral Cortex, Mr. President?

5. Idiocracy: He's my favorite!  In this Comedic look at a possible future of stupidity, a former World Champion Wrestler and Pornstar Dwayne Elizondo Mountain Dew Herbert Camacho (Terry Crews) is President.  He's awesome!  Mind you, the Earth is f$%!ed with him in charge, but it sure is fun!

4. Kisses For My President: Here's a Film being way ahead of the times.  In this 1964 Film, we get a Female President!  Of course, she's married to Fred MacMurray and the whole Film is really about him, but...it was a start.

3. Escape From L.A.: Elect me since I predicted shit.  In this unnecessary Sequel to Escape from New York, we learn that a 'fire and brimstone' Preacher was Elected President after he predicted an Earthquake (of stock footage) that later occurred.  That might be going too far, right?

2. Rapture-Palooza: You can accuse me of cheating, but whatever.  In this odd Comedy, the Anti-Christ rises to power...by poisoning everyone in power above him.  Is he the President?  Well, he's running the Country, so you decide.

1. Les Patterson Saves the World: If nothing else, this is the most obscure.  In this 1987 Australian Comedy Special, Barry Humphries- aka Dame Edna- plays multiple roles, but it is the other Star that is more notable.  The President is...wait for it...Joan Rivers.

You move, Internet!

So that's it.  Enjoy your President's Day and all of the cheap Dining Room Sets available.

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